Lillian Lincoln Lambert

For the last few days in May 2011, millions of people waited with great anticipation to see the final episodes of the Oprah Show. She had decided, after 25 years, to end her very popular daytime talk show to move on to other interests. Many questioned why she would leave a show that has had such success.

Moving on is often a difficult task; whether it is moving to a new job, getting into or out of a relationship or moving away from home. There are so many uncertainties it can be paralyzing. Athletes find it difficult to end his career even when they have been injured or have passed their peak performance. Entertainers hate to leave the limelight when all signs point to declining performance. Entrepreneurs are guilty of staying too long even when their presence is detrimental to the business.

From my own personal experience, it was hard to let go of a business I had birthed and nurtured to maturity. It’s like letting go of your child.  There is never a good time to leave but usually there are signs that there is time for a change. After twenty-five years of operating the business I founded, I sold it. In hindsight I should have exited the business three to four years earlier. Some of my signs were:

1. No longer enjoyed going to work, the passion was gone.

2. Began abdicating some responsibilities

3. Avoided dealing with changes in the marketplace.

4. Reluctant to invest in growth strategies.

These were all key elements in maintaining the business on its successful path.

At some point it is time to let go. Some things may allow for a long planning process about how the change should be made.  In other situations decisions may need to be made quicker. As an entrepreneur, there is time to plan to exit your company if planning is begun early in development of the business.  Reasons to leave a company will vary. i.e. the passion may be gone, as in my case; illness or death may occur or a myriad of other reasons.

I had begun developing a succession plan a few years before selling the company but “dropped the ball” in the process and did not complete it timely. Therefore, when I knew I needed to leave, my options were limited.  I advise clients to begin working on a succession plan soon after starting the business. Having a plan in place does not mean it has to be implemented but if there is no plan your options are limited. Some things to consider are:

*Who is capable of taking over the business?

*Are there family members capable and interested?

*What role do you want to have after leaving the day to day operation?

*Is an employee stock option plan a possibility?

*Is selling part or all of the company something to consider?

Getting adequate answers to these questions takes time and usually requires some outside professional help.

Deciding to “let go” of your company many mean retirement or just give you the flexibility to whatever you desire. I tried retirement for a while but it did not agree with me. I, therefore, got involved in other business ventures. As we know Oprah did not retire but is operating her own network. She had a planned strategy. As successful as the Oprah Show had been she heeded the signs.

If you are an entrepreneur, put in place a plan to exit your business, whether or not you use it.

My husband and I recently returned from a week in picturesque Maui, HI. Little did I realize how stressed I was at the time. Being removed from the hustle and bustle of everyday life gave me time for reflection and viagra look at life from a different prospective.

My summer was quite hectic. I dealt with a number of family health issues. My oldest brother (with whom I had a very close relationship) died from pancreatic cancer in July. Those who read my book may remember my discussion of our relationship. During the last few months of his life, I spent many hours with him and his wife, helping with transportation to and from doctor appointments, dialysis, hospital etc., or just sitting and talking. In May I made the decision to not accept any speaking engagements or book signings in order to free up my time so I could spend more with him. I am so happy I did. Those months were very special for both of us.

Three days after his funeral I was in New York to care for my daughter and granddaughter while my daughter recovered from foot surgery. My stay was to be a 3-4 week commitment but ended up being 6 weeks because of complications from the surgery.  Again, because I had freed up my schedule, I was able to stay.  Family is important to me and helping when needed is not problematic for me.

Those who have been to Maui realize it is a place to relax – not for the party type who wants excitement every day. For me it was a welcome change from the prior few months. After a long flight and recovering from jet lag we played golf, took an all day tour to Hana, HI, explored the island by car, attended a luau, laid on the beach and dined at a couple of great restaurants.

The trip to Hana was one recommended by most that visited as well as those who live there.  It is located on the far end of the island from where we stayed which was about 60 miles away. We were warned, however, that to drive there takes 3½ to 4 hours each way because the road is very narrow and winding with more than 600 curves and many narrow bridges.  We opted to take the all-day bus tour relaxing on a 12-passenger bus accompanied by a knowledgeable driver/guide. The route traversed along the ocean with numerous stops along the way allowing for photo opportunities. The view is breathtaking with many waterfalls, rocks and much vegetation.

Being away for a period of relaxation and reflection was great though it was good to be home.  Over the next few weeks, I will do further reflection, giving thought to where I am in my life and career, then examine my priorities and possibly change some of them.

It was a vacation well spent!

The word family has a different meaning to each person. A family can include a few people or many. It’s how the people interact and relate to each other that gives meaning to the word.

For me, growing up on a farm in rural Virginia, family meant my parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and most of the neighborhood. Many of the neighbors were referred to as aunt, uncle or cousin even though there was no biological connection. Neighbors treated each other as family, visiting, supporting and helping each other, disciplining each other’s children and giving helpful feedback when it seemed appropriate. Because the neighbors worked together, we as children were afraid to misbehave because we knew the consequences whether from our parents, other relatives or neighbors.

Recently, I returned from our 12^th bi-annual family reunion. These are always such joyous occasions as we meet in different parts of the country. Each year there is someone who has not previously attended while many of us have never missed one. Frequently family members invite friends who then become adopted family members. This entitles them to be added to the directory to receive mailings about future reunions.

Our initial reunion was started by my mother in 1987 in our hometown of Powhatan, VA, where she grew up as a child. Over the years we have traveled to Washington, DC, Saddlebrook, New Jersey, Charlotte, NC, Atlanta, GA, Baltimore, MD, Richmond, VA and Wilmington, NC. A few years ago a family member designed a family crest and we adopted the motto: “Strength Through Unity.”

As we progress through the years and the original organizers begin enjoying their golden years, it is refreshing to see the younger generation taking up the reigns. With the younger family members assuming that responsibility, reunions can have an infinite life

I found this reading and thought it was a great one to share. The author is anonymous but the message is powerful.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind to animals.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you make my favorite cake for me, and I learned that the little things can be the special things in life.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I heard you say a prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could always talk to, and I learned to trust in Him.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you make a meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I learned that we all have to help take care of each other.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you take care of our house and everyone in it, and I learned we have to take care of what we are given.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw how you handled your responsibilities, even when you didn’t feel good, and I learned that I would have to be responsible when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw tears come from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it’s all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw that you cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I learned most of life’s lessons that I need to know to be a good and productive person when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I looked at you and wanted to say, ‘Thanks for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn’t looking.’

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.

I have always known that it is the small things in life that really matter. That fact was made more obvious to me over this Father’s Day weekend.

It began on Saturday when I arrived home from running errands.  My husband had received some father’s day cards in the mail and he had them lined up on the dining room table like toy soldiers in a row. With a big smile on his face he asked if I read the card from our youngest daughter. We are a blended family, each of us with adult children when we married.  I have two daughters and my husband has two daughters and one son. This card was from my youngest daughter. In essence it said though they did not share the same genes and were not related by blood, they were related by love. She added her personal note which said “To an awesome father!”  My husband said the card brought tears to his eyes.

Sunday added to his joy. We attended church service together. I was in the choir and he was in the congregation. Shortly after service started, in walked my husband’s son, his daughter, granddaughter and grandson. The look on his face as they approached him at the pew where he was sitting was the look of a kid who just saw his favorite toy under the Christmas tree. He was not expecting any of them. His face glowed throughout the service.  On the way home, he commented that this was one of the best father’s days he can remember. Except for weddings or funerals, he and his son had not worshiped together for years.

How often do we miss opportunities to bring joy to someone by a very simple deed?