Lillian Lincoln Lambert

As we enter into this new school year, there is excitement for students, parents, teachers and school administrators. Many high school seniors face this year with enthusiasm and great anticipation.  At the end of the year they can exert their independence when they leave the comfort of their homes where parents have more control over their lives. Many parents are hopefully that their child will be headed to college and they will be pushing to get the college application completed before the deadline. How many parents ask “Is my child ready for college?

            For some students a year or two break between high school and college can be beneficial.  I speak from experience – a four-year break. My break, however, was not a planned break whereby I was preparing to go later. When I finished high school I did not think I needed a college education. Since my parents had no money to pay for college, I felt free to conquer the world on my own terms. I got my first “degree” from the “school of hard knocks” before realizing I needed a college education.  Finally, I entered a four-year college followed by two years for my graduate degree. For those six years I was very focused; something that was probably unlikely for me immediately after high school.

            If your child is ready for college, that’s great. If not, a planned gap can be very beneficial and does not mean the student is doomed for failure. It can relieve the stress of the application process when the student does apply. The student can take some courses at a community college; do some traveling and take time to explore career options. A great deal of maturity can occur with a carefully laid out plan. I urge parents and students to make the decision that best fits the youngster.

Yesterday was a great day spent in the company of about 15 high school girls. I was invited to be the guest speaker for the Girls Empowerment Program of a summer camp.

I must admit, I was a bit intimidated when I first received the request. My thought was “How will I relate to a small group of teenage girls?” I need not have worried. These young ladies were attentive, respectful, interactive and anxious to learn. I shared with them my life story: how and where I grew up, mistakes I made, things I did well and not so well, how I dealt with challenges and overcame obstacles. They had questions and were not reluctant to ask them and to get involved in the discussion. Our discussion dealt with goal setting, decision making, self esteem and career planning. The overall theme of my message was based on this quote by Mark Caine, an author: “The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you find yourself”. I left them with a list of my “Guiding Principles”, which were developed based on the experiences of my life.

At the end of the session the sponsor gave each young lady a copy of my memoir, “The Road to Someplace Better: From the Segregated South to Harvard Business School and Beyond”.  I signed the books and personalized each girl’s copy.

It was a very rewarding day.

Many people perceive getting older as a negative. I feel just the opposite. I am thankful for each day that I am able to start my day in good mental and physical health.  I don’t take it for granted.

Growing older has given me the opportunity of having many varied experiences. With these experiences have come maturity and wisdom. A former pastor once said “Youth and wisdom don’t reside in the same body”. There is some truth to that because wisdom is acquired as a result if some level of longevity. However longevity does not necessarily assure the acquisition wisdom.

With age has come a greater level of confidence. I am no longer as concerned about what people think about what I do, my beliefs or actions. My years have given me a level of intelligence that would dictate that I consider the consequences of my actions. I therefore would do nothing to damage my character or reputation. But I don’t need the type of permission or approval that I felt was needed at a younger age. I feel liberated to do things that I may have previously wanted to do but could not because of lack of time or resources or was concerned about “what people would say”. It could be a new hobby, skill or just something challenging. I find it easier to say no to things in which I don’t want to be involved or in which I have no interest. I have learned to spend more time taking care of me. I often have what I call “be good to myself days”.

I enjoyed my younger days but I am enjoying my older days just as much if not more.

Recently, a very talented writer for The Richmond Times Dispatch, Iris Taylor, wrote a profile of me, published May 31, 2010.  http://ht.ly/1S6Ov. The article explored various aspects of my life from a child growing up on a small farm with few modern conveniences in rural Powhatan, VA to my current life as an author and professional speaker. I received lots of feedback about the article but one in particular stood out.

This was from a 65-year-old retired teacher in Powhatan who thinks I was sent to her through the article because of a dream she has.  Over the past couple of years the county has faced some critical issues dealing with their youth. This lady works with the YMCA and wants to use their resources to engage, motivate and inspire both black and white youth of the county. To her the article was another “omen” to move forward. She has asked me to work with her on a committee she wishes to establish and I have agreed to do so.

What better way to come full circle – going back to the place I started and have a positive impact on the lives of young people!